The Dr. House Drinking Game

House M.D. is indeed one of the best shows on TV. Like many others, I enjoy watching it. And to increase my enjoyment of the show even more, I started a House Drinking Game. With the help of others, inlcuding Jim “Suldog” Sullivan and Digg user toxicredm, I now present:

The Dr. House Drinking Game

• When Gregory House pops a Vicodin, take a drink.
• If he goes the entire episode without popping a Vicodin, take three .
• When someone has a seizure, take a drink.
• When someone goes into cardiac arrest, take a drink.
• When a patient bleeds profusely, take a drink.
• When a patient spews fluid from a body orifice, take a drink.
• When a patient spews blood from a body orifice, take two drinks.
• When a patient doubts House's diagnosis, take a drink.
• When House's team disagrees with his diagnosis, take a drink for each member of the team.
• When Cuddy countermands House's orders, take a drink.
• When House acts against Cuddy or hospital rules, take a drink.
• When House insults one of his clinic patients, take a drink.
• When House talks down to one of the hospital staff, take a drink.
• When House or his team illegally searches someone's home, take a drink.
• When House and his team performs any medical procedure against the patient's wishes, take a drink.
• Whenever you find out a patient is fibbing on his medical history, take a drink.
• Whenever House lies in a patient report, take a drink.
• Then, when House tells a patient he'll die unless he cooperates, take a drink.
• Every time there is sexual tension between two characters, take a drink for every doctor involved. (Borrowed from the Grey's Anatomy drinking game.)
• Every time House makes an inappropriate sexual comment to Cuddy or Cameron, take a drink.
• Every time House makes an insensitive racial remark to Foreman, take a drink.
• Every time House makes fun of Aussies to Chase, take a drink. (Hey, we can't leave him out!)
• Whenever someone makes a current-event or pop-culture reference, take a drink. (Borrowed from the Gilmore Girls drinking game.)
• Every time someone has mommy or daddy issues, take a drink.
• Every time it’s not lupus, take a drink.
• If they think it might be cancer, take a drink.
• If they have to choose which tests to do, because they're out of time or there's some other restraint, take a drink.
• If they perform every test they can think of on a diagnostic fishing expedition, no matter the cost, take a drink.

I’ve actually tried this game, and it is enough to get you a good buzz watching an average episode of House. In fact, it may be a bit too much. :)

-TimK